It seems wierd as to how some incidents in your childhood tend to impact your life or shape your persona.
My brother was a 5 years old kid. I was 12 years and in my 7th standard. One saturday, I was doing my biology drawings. He came running and snatched my pencil sharpner knife. Since he was small and the knife sharpner was really sharp, I was scared that he would hurt himself. So, as an immediate reaction, I tried to snatch it from his hand.
And Lo!!! In that tussle, the knife gave a deep cut on his finger. Blood oozed out and he started wailing.
My mom, who had just about returned home from office, came running. She saw all the blood and without understanding the background screamed at me and said:
"Vidya, instead of fighting with him every day like this, why don't you just kill him once for all".
She was very angry. And I was deeply hurt. My mother, whom I loved so much, had made such a statement. She had not even tried to find out the fact that I was actually trying to save him from hurting himself...
That was the LAST MEMORY I have of my brother. I "switched" him off from my mind. And that was the last day I spoke with him.
From that day, to the next 15 years, I did not talk to him. I was totally indifferent to him and his upbringing. To the extent that, I don't remember or recollect any image of him growing up or in his teens.
Although, I do talk to him now... I don't have that closeness I should ideally have with my brother.
Brother, this is not your fault. It is just a decision I made when I was small owing to this incident. I know I have been a jerk and I take full responsibility for doing this. I am hoping I will improve and do something about this at least now...
It will surely get better Vidya n u will be close soon. N yeah, it was all in the situation. None of u were responsible.
ReplyDeleteReminds me of that song 'Kelhidhu sulhagabahudu; nodidhu sulhagabahudu'
oh sad..
ReplyDelete@AM,
ReplyDeleteI cannot really say I own a car... it is owned by both my hubby and me. He pays the EMI and I get to drive it :P
@ Swaram,
No, I did not get hurt...so, you can laugh to your hearts content...
Yes, the only satisifaction i too have from this incident is of stopping 1 person from doing such things outside :P
ohhh, sadly the innocent minds and feelings should be nurtured in a good way, otherwise the impact remains so etched in heart right???
ReplyDeleterecently i met one of my old schoolmates. how much ever i try, i can not stop myself from judging about her, i still have the image that, the person had ditched me in some silly lunch group politics.. even after 20 years, when i talk to her, i have the feeling, she isnt trust worthy...
strange :-/
@ Khushi, Yes very strange... we truly are the script writers of our own personality... and this is what I learnt after attending Landmark Forum
ReplyDelete