Amsterdam Diary

Here I am, sitting at the Schiphol terminal, Amsterdam waiting for my connecting flight to Minneapolis (MNPLS or MPLS). It had been a while since I had travelled out of the country. May be I had forgotten or may be, age has caught up with me, every bone in my body aches after the flights from Bangalore to Dubai (4 hours) and Dubai to Amsterdam (7 hours) - not to mention the 4 hours wait time at Dubai :(

While Dubai airport becons one to shop, shop and shop (Dubai duty free is a huge shopping experience right at the Dubai airport - I am planning to check this out on my way back !!!)

Upon my arrival at Amsterdam airport, first thing that greeted me were bunches and bunches of Tulips. I forgot that the famous Rekha-Bacchan song - Dekha ek khwab to yeh silsile hue - was shot here...

The airport in itself is HUGE - as all international airports. However, this one represents the country's culture far better. The blue ceramics for which Holland is famous for is on sale at the airport - however a small pair of shoes or key chain costs 3 or 4 Euros.

As usual, my Indian Mentality automatically kicked in... I started converting 1 euro = x INR - OMG !!! that's huge money. Let me not buy anything here.... So, although I was attracted to some very neat pieces of blue ceramics and lindt chocolates, I did not buy any of them... so much for being an Indian.

Will i ever stop converting, stop thinking about money and just buy whatever I want? Without thinking of the money I am going to spend... ???

Dubai Diary

I landed at Dubai International Airport at 11.30 Indian time (9 p.m. local time)


I see Dubai with a mix of fear, apprehension, and awe - fear because I have read and heard stories of what happens to people who get caught in the wrong side of law - the punishment is gruesome.

Apprehension - my first time here and the airport is huge with more than 260 gates. Takes a long time to go from one gate to the other... Will I get lost? Will I find my connecting flight to Amsterdam? As it is, the kingfisher flight to Dubai was late by 1 hour 5 mins.

Awe because the airport is such. It is immensely clean, provides great facilities to a traveler (including free wi-fi connectivity) and shopping kiosks... :D

Luckily, as I was heading out of the aircraft, I saw this bespectacled person walking beside me. I asked him if he were bound for Amsterdam. He said yes and he would go all the way to MPLS. I was glad - i had company. If not for anything, at least to find gates and terminals and not get lost.!!!

Terribly tired and out of sleep... Missing my home, my bed and the kids. Each time, I hug Aditi and sleep - and once both of them are sound asleep, I wake up, hug and kiss them, say "I love you" to both before hitting the bed...

Sigh....

Aditi started school

And I am a happy mother !!!

Yes, Aditi has joined Play Group at Euro Kids. I am particularly happy with this branch of Euro Kids. They really have very good teachers, they take care of the kids and kids really stop crying within 2-3 days.

I have seen this with both my kids - they have just liked going to Euro Kids.

First two days, I had to go with her, stay with her through the 1 hour and then get her back home. She was comfortable because amma was with her.

Third day, she was not aware that I would drop her at the gate and go back. Once she realized this, she started howling and did not stop howling till i picked her up.

Fourty day - she was much better. She pretended to cry till she was at her class' threshold. And then curiousity took over. She had stopped crying and had started observing her surroundings.

Fifth day - she was cool as cucumber. Took her bag, went in without kicking any fuss....

Sigh... she is growing up each day... and I am growing old each day!!! LoL :)

Tale of Rings

One of my husband's cousins, who is an astrologer, suggested that I wear 2 rings made of 2 different gem stone. Now, I am one who believes "never leave an opportunity to buy gold" - so what if this can be eyed as me being superstitious....

So, off I went, purchased the stone and got the ring made. And after practicing the rituals to wear the ring, when I wore it on my right fingers, I realized I was no better than Phantom.

That evening, I was telling my son about this - and he had not heard about the Phantom story. I walked him through the fantasy of Kit Walker, who promises on his father's skull to fight piracy. I went on to talk about the skull cave, the diamond glass, phantom's rings - the "good" swastik and the "bad" skull rings.

And I added "see, next time you throw a tantrum, I am going to punch you with my right fist. This would leave 2 marks on your chin -very much like phantom.

Immediately, my son shot back "Nope, not phantom. The marks will be that of a "Fat" "Amma"

Since then, he refers to my rings as "Fat Amma" Rings!!!

Letter to the forest department

Today morning, my husband requested me to write a letter in Kannada addressing to the Forest Department Officials.

And this truly was a humbling and embarassing experience. I realized, although I am a born, brought up in karnataka person, I do not know how to write a letter in kannada.

For instance, I did not know how to write "Respected Sir" and "Sub" and "Trim the tree". It was so bad that eventually, I wrote the word "trim" in kannada alphabets and instead of "Respected Sir", I wrote "Respected Helper"....

Any person reading the letter is bound to be offended and I would not be surprised if s/he refuses to help my husband.

But - good thing is that since the letter is from my husband to the forest department officials, in all possibilities, they will believe that the letter was written by him.

If you are seeing 2 devil horns behind my head - you are correct :P

Technology Training

I am sitting in a technical training session. This did not happen by accident. After what seems ages, I enrolled, consciously with both eyes open, into a technical training course on Sharepoint 2010.

I thought - so what if I am in the management cadre? Learning and keeping updated with technology will always do me good.

And with this thought at the back of my head, I nominated myself and my manager approved.

However, while the class itself is going on well - sadest part (and the part I dislike the most) is that there is no hands-on practicals as they do not have the necessary environment.

How can I learn any technology without hands-on? If I need a theory session, I can as well read up about this on the internet or Microsoft Official site. I am so very disappointed.

Anger Management

Nope, I am not talking about the movie.

I have been taking counselling sessions on anger management. One of the tips I received was to start observing my breath when I start getting angry.

BUT - when I am truly angry - the only thing I do NOT do - is watching my breath.

How am I suppose to remember doing that when all I can do is shake in a fit of rage?

Seriously welcome any tips on this.

May be, a reading of "Power of Now" might help me - someone has vastly recommended this book. I am going to try and read this and see if I can learn a thing or two about how I can manage my anger better.

Cannot stay away

Okay, I was feigning to be very busy and did try staying away from blogging. For no apparent reason.
I just did not feel like blogging.

So, abstained myself for a period of good 3 months, I suppose.

Must say, this was a refreshing break... and now, I have so many stories to blog... Isn't it good?

But I must confess...staying away did not do me good...there were several instances when I caught myself almost logging into the blog site to share my story :P

Frustration

I am truly frustrated today. After my baby sitter went through a surgery to set right her oesophagus blockage; I have been making a conscious effort to cook soft breakfast such as Idly, Dosa, Pongal etc - which are soft to chew.

After trying out everything, today, I tried my hand at preparing cucumber kadabu. This kadabu can be made both spicy as well as sweet. The batter for the spicy kadabu became a bit thin. So, after the steaming, the top layer had become quity soggy. But it did taste good.

However, my baby sitter saw that soggy layer and refused to eat the kadabu. She adamantly prepared dosa for herself (I always keep dosa batter in the fridge for emergencies).

I was FURIOUS. Could see myself shake from head to toe.

And this is a lady who will not have anything to eat at home if she stops earning her salary. A person who is really struggling because her husband does not earn anything. Rather, whatever he earns he spents on booze...

What do I do with people like this? Should I call it ego? Should I call it "Pride"?

How do I handle this at all?

Hallu Iddavarige Kadale

I was adjusting the water temperature for the hand shower preparing for my bath. That is when I realized how apt the above adage was.
During summer, when there is ample sun and the solar energy gives really HOT water... we don't want it. But during winter, we crave for HOT water, which we rarely get.
I started wondering if there is a way we could save all the solar energy during summer to use it during winter/rainy season. What a bliss it would be to get HOT water when you really want it...
BTW, there are 4 variations of this adage, I want to share as I find them funny:
1. Hallu iddavarige Kadale Illa, Kadale iddavarige Hallu Illa
--- those who have teeth will not have groundnuts to eat; those who have groundnuts will not have teeth
2. Kudalu iddavarige Bachanige illa, Bachanige iddavarige kudalu illa
--- those who have hair will not have a comb; those with the comb will not have hair
3. Kelasa illade anubhava illa, anubhava illade kelasa illa
--- no work without experience - no experience without job
4. Hucchu bidade maduve illa - maduve aagade hucchu bidolla :P
--- last, but not the least "without marriage your lunacy will not be cured; without lunacy being cured you cannot get married
Do share if you have heard other variations ...

J in Bangalore

My friend, J, who moved to UK along with her husband is coming to Bangalore on a 3 weeks vacation.
The reason I am mentioning this here is because I saw a curious phenomenon. J had sent an email telling S and I about her impending visit. And we are very excited about J's Bangalore visit.
Then, it happened. Multiple people in the organization started pinging/calling/walking over to me just to tell me about J's impending visit to Bangalore. And they casually start "Hi Vidya... do you know J is coming to Bangalore" and I am like "oh..yeah...she told me..."
Then I started thinking about this. Why are these people, who normally never talk to me, pinging me to tell about J?
Several conclusions:
1. It was very evident that J has managed to retain good relationships with all ex-colleagues not just S and I
2. These people, who still, are in the organization, are really happy about the prospect of meeting J as much as S and I

3. May be they want to see me green with envy (and they largely succeeded !!!) showcasing the fact that they too are J's friends :P

Refreshing Post

There are some of us who talk about "India and the Diverse Culture" and some who talk about "East, West, North and South India - the great divide" and some who strive only to create a divide based on language, caste, culture - name it.

Out of all these mayhem, one blog, which I bumped into today, felt so very refreshing. I felt so good reading this piece, that I decided to do a blog post on this blog post :P

Here is the link. Go on - read it and enjoy!!!

Bitter Sweet Memories

Yesterday night, unusually, I was reminscing about few bitter memories surrounding my dad and maternal uncle that have stayed with me. And they refuse to leave me and go. They not only haunt me time-to-time but torment me mercilessly.


I have just 1 maternal uncle. But he has always liked my sister more than me. He has been very vocal about his choice when he used to tell to his friends and relatives “S is my favorite niece”. This could possibly be because of the fact that I have always been rebellious in my nature – especially when restricted. But then, everyone wants to be loved. I felt (feel ?) so sad to accept that he loved my sister more than I.

In particular, I remember the following incidents:

I studied in all girls school. During 9th standard, school had organized a day long trip to Belur and Halebidu. My entire class was going and even I wanted to go. When I sought permission, my uncle refused to let me go. I truly don’t understand why. When I started rebelling, he asked me to talk to my dad. And even my dad refused to let me go. What was worst – they were not giving me any logical reason for denying me permission. Again, I had to create a hungama to get permission and finally did manage to go on this trip. But at what cost?

I wanted to learn to ride a 2-wheeler. My dad never had anytime nor patience to teach his girls himself. My uncle offered to teach us. One early morning, he took both of us – my sister and I – to the near by ground. I had purchased a new Hero Puch. He said he will teach my sister first. Although, I was disappointed, I accepted to waited for my turn.

And that is what I did for the next 1.5 hours. They did not turn up at all. Tired of waiting and my feet aching all over, I walked back home in a huff. Upon reaching home, he made fun of this situation and promised (not so seriously) to teach me another day. That “another” day NEVER came. But I wanted to learn 2-wheeler. I started pestering my dad to teach me. My dad, if not anything, is an expert in delegating work.

Over the week end, a middle-aged uncle, one of my dad’s reportees came home. He said dad had entrusted him the task of teaching me to ride a 2-wheeler. Although, I was extremely disappointed with my dad, the thought of learning to ride brought cheer.

I took this uncle to the ground along with my new Hero Puch. He asked me to be seated in the driver seat and he sat pillion for ease of teaching. First half hour, he taught me how to balance the vehicle, nuances of riding etc. But very soon, I noticed that his hands started roving at all wrong places of my body. While I was riding the vehicle, he was carassing me all over…

I was so scared that I let go of the bike. We both fell off the bike. I told “Uncle” I wanted to go home. By the time we reached home, my dad had arrived. He asked how did it go. This “Uncle” said it was going on fine but I had asked to go home and he did not understand why.

My dad was furious. He scolded me for missing out on a good opportunity and said he will never engage anybody else to teach me. In many ways, I was happy that he never engaged anybody else to teach me. With whatever little knowledge I had picked up, I went on to learn this myself.

But then, the saddest part, to me, is the fact that my dad did not bother to think or understand the reason beneath my denial to learn from this uncle. Even after I voluntarily told him about this incident, his words left me shocked “I don’t think this uncle is that kind of a person. You are very much mistaken”. — this was the first incident that told me that my father did not trust me.

During college days, one of my classmates, R’s sister was getting married. And we all knew her quite well as we used to visit his place often. The reception was being held in Hotel Ajantha and several of our classmates wanted to go. As was my upbringing, I asked my dad for his permission. And you cannot imagine what his response was – “I will not allow you to go. I know that with the pretext of attending this classmates sister’s reception, you will loaf around cubbon park that falls on the way. You will spoil the name of my family” — second incident that told me he NEVER trusted me.

And, I stopped asking permission from him. From this day, I went on to do all the things I wanted to do ever.

I don’t regret the way I turned out to be. For, I am a much better person and a compassionate human being now. I have grown up and learnt a lot from these incidents. I learnt that if I were brave and did the right things, I did not have to be scared nor tell lies. People tell lies because they are scared, out of sheer fear factor.
I also started taking my own decisions, which made me very responsible. So, in many ways, I have to thank these incidents for the way I have turned out to be
But then, somewhere, it still hurts. I still feel so bitter about these incidents. I have neither been able to forget nor forgive.

Amma Ninna Tolinalli Kanda Naanu

As far as I can remember, my mother has always been there for me. She has always stood tall and strong and has supported me in all my endeavors and (mis)adventures. She has saved me from my dad’s beatings several times and has allowed me to be my own self doing my own things. She is the reason why I am so independent, successful, well educated person today.


She never hesitated to accept her Iyengar son-in-law, when I announced my decision to marry him. She never let me lose my courage when I lost job owing to recession and took to learning stained glass wanting to start my own business (which never took off, incidentally)

Though, when I look back, I see she was a wee bit partial to my brother, she has always been there for me. I could always look for that support, understanding and guidance in the years of experience and wisdom she has.

So, yesterday, when she called me to say that she had severe pain in the lower back and was unable to get up, I could not believe what I was hearing.

To me, she is still young. I have failed to realize as I have grown up, she has grown older. Her bones are not as strong as they used to be. Her shoulders have become frail carrying the luggage of all these years. My eyes grew moist. I took half day off from office to take her to the ortho.

Luckily it was just a muscle sprain and nothing else. But this incident was an eye opener. It felt as if I was close to losing her forever and the pain I went through was excruciating.

She knows that how much ever I have grown up, I am still a kid in her eyes. She still wants to protect and safeguard me against this cruel world….

I shudder to think what will happen when she is not with me anymore….

Innocent Musings

S P Balasubramanyam, the veteran playback singer who has sung in several languages, has released an album of prayers for the kids. It is titled “Chants for Children”.
I really liked the idea as this album contains simple shlokas with SPB as the lead singer and kids joining the chorus. This album has shlokas such as Agajanana padmarkam, gurur brahma gurur vishnu, namastestu mahamaye, shuklambaradharam, etc.
So happy was I to hear this album, I decided to download this from Nokia’s Music Store onto my cell phone. After successfully downloading few chants, I decided to play them during bed time – instead of the usual story time.
When the 2nd chant was playing, my son asked: - “Amma, are these children very poor?”
I answered (ears allover) “No, why”
Pat came the response “Then, why are they singing like this?”
Actually the chorus in these chants comes across very amateurish – more like street kids singing for money.
I could not help laughing at his observations.

How should I answer this?

I had picked up a copy of Junior Chandamama for my kids. In that, they have a cartoon series that introduces an animal or a bird to its readers. This introduction is setup as an introduction with the animal or bird by a small girl who asks questions like "Where do you live?, what kind of food do you eat? What other species do you have? etc. In this edition, they were introducing the Fox.
The small girl who was "interviewing" the animal was dressed like a jungle-bred girl - basically a green skirt drawn to give it a grass-like look. And had not worn anything on top.
My daughter, to whom, I was explaining the features of a fox, suddenly stopped me and asked "Amma, this akka has not worn anything on top. She is half-naked, Right?"

Its all in our mind

Several times I had heard that if you want something to happen, just think about it and believe in your thought – and Lo Behold ! it will come true.

I had not believed this enough. But over the week end, I truly experienced this -

1. I was searching for a particular company’s website that brings teachers (of sports, crafts, any hobby) to learners. I have used their service to learn stained glass and other things 8 years ago. And suddenly I wanted to learn something new, which was the reason I was thinking about them. I thought and thought and thought over the last 3 weeks – their name was lost to me.

But saturday, I talked about this to a friend and also had a positive thought in me when I affirmed that “you know what I am going to find their name soon”. True enough, on my drive back home, as I was searching over google for their name, suddenly, it came back to me. Anyone in Bangalore, who wants to acquire a hobby, please go ahead and check out this company’s website here.

2. Sunday morning, I had a feeling that although my day would go along wonderfully, my maid would be on leave.

And that is exactly what happened – my baby sitter was on leave and maid did not turn up. How did they come to know I was expecting them to take off? God knows…

My husband got breakfast from hotel, I cleaned the utensils and the house, cooked lunch. For the first time in several months, the 4 of us were able to have lunch together and it was good fun. It was truly nice to see my 2.5 years old daughter eat by herself. Thus, the day went on very well, despite smaller hurdles.

It was so amazing to see 2 examples back-2-back where things happened based on my thoughts… I have started consciously thinking positive thoughts so my thoughts can have positive impact on my day :D

"Funny Blog Oscars"

And the funny Blog Oscar goes to none other than Lostworld.

Time Turns

Title of a news paper article: Pink Slips in 2009 - Attritions in 2010

How true - last year saw several organizations slicing and dicing hikes, employees, benefits as economy nosedived. Need based hiring was the buzz word and the oxy-moron "Flat Growth" made headlines. But this year, as market is turning around, IT employees are all set to rule the roost. With several organizations hiring, companies are slowly but surely seeing an increase in attrition rates.

"Deemed Universities" - JOKE

Published on television yesterday:

Question: What did one deemed university say to the other deemed university when they met?
Answer: Nothing. They did not recognize each other

Mother's Letter to her son

Dear Aakash,

You may think I have lost my nut to be writing a letter to you at a time when I can easily talk to you. But then, you need to understand that you are just 6.5 years old and are at an age when you don't necessarily understand my language - language of a mother.

I am a working mother - working to share the financial burden of running our family along with your father. Together, we both work very hard - to be able to provide good food, clothing, shelter and education to both you and your sister. And I realize that at your age, you are still too young to understand how much we slog to earn whatever we earn.

Monday, you woke up early, switched on TV and kept on watching it for 1 hour without brushing your teeth. Despite repeated reminders from me - you were sitting in front of the idiot box watching without batting your eyelids. All my requests went on to your deaf ears. Eventually, I had to shout at you in order to get you ready in time to catch your school bus. How many days do you think we can take a detoure to drop you to your school before we go to office?

With lot of pain, I had prepared sandwich and it pained me to see you had not eaten at all.

Tuesday, you started the day crying - for no reason. May be you woke up grouchy...but then it is not my fault. You cried because bournvita was not hot enough, you cried to brush your teeth, you cried to take bath... how many tears do you want to shed before realizing things don't work this way in the real world?
Aloo Tikkis I had made, came back as I had packed them. Why at all should i take extra time to steam good old vegetables and convert them into a tasty snack for you?

Evening you created a tantrum to take your medicine. You were so playful that you spilled the medicine. Your appa got so angry, he whacked you. And you went to bed crying. Will you ever know the heart ache and sadness your appa and I went through after this event? Our hearts broke yet another time for punishing you.

Wednesday, you had forgotten your diary at home today. your Madam has sent a note that you waste time sharpening pencils. She has asked me to sharpen them and send them with you. Humph...yet another task to my already overflowing bucket. When will you start taking some responsibility for these small tasks?
Today night, yet again another tantrum - you wanted me to make a corn cup for you. Despite headache and tiredness, I prepared the corn. You did not eat your dinner properly. But did finish the Corp Cup.

Understand that I do all these things because I love you dearly and want you to be happy. I don't want you to think I love only Aditi and not you. There are so many different ways I show my love for you - except that you are not "seeing" it.

Thursday, despite several requests from your appa, you dilly-dallied. You missed your school bus today and we were adamant about NOT dropping you to school today in our car - as we used to do each time there was a delay. We have left you be at home deliberately. I hope this will be a lesson that you will never forget - things will NEVER wait for you - may be once or twice - but never more. So, please learn this lesson and learn well.

Friday, I am hoping tomorrow will be a better day - where you will do everything by yourself, be a good boy, not cry, take your medicines without fuss, eat your breakfast. Please be a nice boy - please understand we are working very hard in order to give you and Aditi a bright future.

With lots of love and hugs,

Yours lovingly,
Amma

New Friend

I met her first during last week of October. We met by accident. And since that time, I have always been intrigued by her looks, her style statement.

I have always wondered how can she be so posh compared to others in the same group? How can she be so smooth? How can she attract so much attention and why so? What is so special in her?

My triast with her continued as I came to know more about her. Well into November, when I took her around my office, my collegues jaws dropped. It was evident that they were as much at awe with her as I continued to be.

She attracted several "eyes" and "comments" from onlookers. 2 guys on a bike commented aloud for me to hear "Maama, Avalanna nodu... sakkathagiddale" (Man, look at her, she is soooo nice). I laughed. I was proud that she was with me.

Eventually, as I got to know her better, I understood and accepted that she would be there for me as long as I wanted her with me. She would safe guard me always. I realized that she was the best thing to happen to me in the last 3 months - she is my new Fiat Punto

Rising Sun?

His name is Teja. Right from his birth, he has brought immense happiness and joy to his parents. His father, M, comes from a family that is in distress - their elder son is autistic. Teja's grandparents have spent their entire lifetime looking after their elder son.

M and I became friends during our college days. We studied together for 5 years and continued to stay in touch. M is also my husband, S' best friend. We were there for M's wedding and all the joys that came into their lives afterwords. We have participated and hosted several lunches and have thoroughly enjoyed their company -both M and his wife, B, are very friendly couple and made for each other.

When Teja entered their life, their happiness knew no bounds - he truly was the apple of their eyes.

So, it was very shocking when I heard today that Teja has been diagonsed with Leukemia.

I am very numb and don't know what to say!!!

Long week end and movies

I was on leave from December 30th until January 3rd. That was quite a long break with a long week end thrown in.

For the first time in 6 years, S and I watched 2 movies in theatre in a span of 5 days and made up for not watching any over last 6 years.

We watched Avatar (3D) and 3 Idiots. Here are some reviews:

Avataar (3D)

* Movie is awesome
* I liked Neytiri's character and the Na'vi tribe
* Loved those animals - would possibly like to ride one of them - the one that flies ;)
* I loved the forest created on Pandora - Given a choice, I would go live on Pandora (which incidentally is the name of the moon earthlings choose to invade for mineral rock.
* The 3D glasses were not of good quality. Hence did not truly give the effect one would expect
* Loved all the action and special effects
* Watching the movie in a multiplex was worth all the money

3 Idiots

 * 50% straight lift from Chetan Bhagat's book - Five Point Someone - what not to do in IIT - though Aamir Khan and Vidhu Vinod Chopra have openly disagreed - I have read this book and watched the movie
* Lovely movie over all - amazing to note the ease with which Aamir Khan, Madhavan and Sraman Joshi portray the characters of 3 college going dudes. They truly don't look their age
* You will LOVE Boman Irani as Viru Sahasrabuddhi (VIRUS) :)
* Kareena's role is good
* Mona Kapoor was the surprise but (un)wanted package. Actually they could have "lifted" the last piece from Chetan's novel and that would have made a better ending to the "restication" story
* Talented actor - Javed Jaffery is wasted. They could have got somebody else to do that role
* Loved Chatur and his speech - hilarious and apt
* Ending was very surprising and nice.
* Word of Caution - This movie is highly infectious. Watch at your own risk

New Year with ZOO ZOO